One year ago today....

September 11th means a lot of things for a lot of people. It's a date that no one will ever forget. My reason for never forgetting this date is for a little bit of a different reason. One year ago today, I found out I was pregnant. My life changed in a matter of seconds on a Sept. 11th. I remember waking up that morning and feeling weird...not like myself, but I went about my day, did my business, and returned home from work feeling even less like myself than that morning. I remember thinking on a whim that I couldn't possibly be pregnant, but I should take a test just to be sure. I also remember sitting on the turlet (as my grandpa calls it) and watching the pee stick go from no lines to two lines in about 1 minute and thinking to myself, "THIS CAN'T BE HAPPENING! THERE IS NO FREAKIN' WAY I'M HAVING A BABY!" My emotions ran the gambit in that moment...from terrified to sadness to excitement to utter joy! I also remember thinking it's kinda weird that on September 11th of all days, I find out I'll be having a baby. My first reactions were to cry hysterically...then I felt the urgance to get to Walmart as soon as possible and buy another test to check. I remember about an hour after the 1st test, I got in the car with my friend Lori and showed her the test and said, "I can't be pregnant can I?" She took to Walmart where I bought my 2nd test and took it right there in the Walmart bathroom where of course it gave all signs for positive! After that test, I tried to figure out a way to tell Justin and I remember being so afraid of how mad he would inevitably be at me. I was terrified, but I bought him a bib that said Daddy's Favorite or something like that and as soon as I got home from Walmart, I started crying hysterically...again...and then I told him. He held me while I apologized about 100 times over and he just told me that everything was going to be alright.

Justin was right. Actually, he was more than right. Never in a million years could I have imagined that I would have a beautiful baby boy that I would love more than anything in the world and that I would love being a mommy as much as I do. One year later, I hold my now 4 month old son and I wonder how I ever lived without him. Thank you Justin for giving me the best, most surprising gift I've ever been given! I love you more everyday baby. It's days like today where I can't help but be extremely grateful for God's big surprises! I have to remember that sometimes he has a different bigger plan than I have for myself and I'm so glad for that :0)

Jackson turned 4 months old today! Happy birthday canoodle bug! Momma and daddy love you big guy. Stay tuned in a few weeks for his new details (height, weight, development, etc.). I'll post pictures tomorrow.